Decease… Death… Die…

After watching the videos and doing some activities, I realized that to be inside the Sandwich generation is a real hard job and sometimes it is necessary to be so brave and patient to overcome all the difficulties which can accompany this caregiving.

I liked so much the videos. People were showing their love and really gentle feelings towards the people whom they were taking care about. These people faced the border where they had to choose between their own children and husband and between their parents. I understand that it is so difficult to share the time between many people and I’m sure there is a wish to cut yourself to pieces to be able to pay attention to all details and to everybody in the family. It is so difficult to do this choice, ignore yourself, forgetting even to eat and having so little sleep. But the most important thing here that these people are ready and want to do this, they are eager to spend the time with people whom they love with all their hearts. And how it is difficult when these beloved people are passing away…

I have read a lot of information and I have watched a lot of video material, and some people were advising not to forget about your own life, your own plans. But this medal has two sides. Not forgetting about your own world, your privacy, your plans – this is great and this is right because the life is passing by when you are caring about somebody and don’t pay attention to yourself, to your own wishes. And the other side is that if the person, daughter, for example, is really loving and caring daughter, how will she be able to think about her make-up or going to the swimming-pool when her mother is needing her and she really needs your time, your talks with her, maybe calming down her, maybe even singing to her…How a loving daughter can ignore the feelings of the beloved person? This is just impossible and here is the situation….People very often don’t know what to do because it is so difficult, so difficult life and everybody wants something from you, and you are so tired and for that moment you want only the single thing – just stay in bed and doing nothing. So, the conclusion for this, from my point of view, this is the destiny of really loving caregivers, people who are taking care about their old parents or grandparents. They will have to do this because they cannot ignore them. And in addition, they want to do this, because they know that every minute spent with their parents or grandparents can be the last and it becomes more valuable in million times.

From my own experience, I’m taking care of three children and my father. But we are a great family and we can cope with everything together, we are really caring and helpful. This helps a lot. You need not do everything yourself. I raised my children in such way that they know that helping their Mommy is their saint duty and they will be doing this because they love me and respect me. And concerning my father… He is absolutely independent person, he is very active, he is fishing, riding bike, running, swimming. He is great and it is so easy with him. Of course, like in every family, there can happen some misunderstandings, but this is the trifle, the most important thing that we are together and together – we are a power.

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